Time with friends...Rome and Pisa

 So hectic once again....wait a minute....I continue to be hectic! About two weeks ago my allocated appointment time finally arrived for an interview for my official permit to stay in Italy for 6 months.... But on my mission for retrieving all required documents I discovered that my passport was missing...eeeek!

Rome

This alone required several trips to the local caribnieri, Questura, (various levels of police) etc with the inevitable trip to the Australian embassy....in Rome!!! The silver lining in it all really! The idea of a train trip to Roma with a change over in Firenze with three kids was somewhat intimidating but I had the privilege and comfort in knowing that we would be warmly received in Rome by the Tani/Crino family...our Italian family :-)

The train trip went exceptionally smooth and the children fantastic on the way to Rome...and our welcoming party did not disappoint. The children were whisked into a world of fun, warmth and music…..not to mention a heartwarming meal J It is always such a pleasure and home style comfort to be in the company of this family. The various personalities and talents of this family never cease to fascinate and entertain myself and the children….

The next day was down to business and once again I was spoiled by having Francesca chaperone me through the Roman bus system – which I am absolutely sure I would have performed dismally… Without drama we reached the practical and comprehensive service of the Australian Embassy in Rome. Once all paperwork duties were complete we headed for home…..I have to point out that this bus trip was so much more enjoyable because A) I had somebody telling me exactly where, when and what I needed to do and B) this bus route dissected the center of Rome, seeing many of the major sites and treasure troves Rome has offers on such a majestic and impressive scale.

After a well earned rest we head out again for the evening to our other Italian family the Guzzetta’s who we shared such a magnificent time with in Lampedusa. This was an evening of Japanese and the a grand tour of their newly renovated apartment in central Rome….we were all very impressed with the transformation and I loved the combination of modern edge with old style architecture…nicely done!

The following days we spent with both families rambling through some of the grand sized villa gardens, having picnics, playing soccer, going to markets and strolling through the center of town where we ate some GF pizza J

The train ride home was a little more hectic as we returned on a Sunday afternoon – trains were packed. My problems were mainly due to A)my belated realization that the tickets we had been allocated were infact separated between car 8 and car 10 – not possible (although tempting:-/) to separate me and two children – nor legal I would imagine.. and B) the complete lack of cavalier in of anyone (particularly the men) around me. The two seat that we located we occupied and the people in the seats refused to move as they two had been allocated those seats…BUT they were both young early 20’s romantic couple who were blind to the fact I had just hauled on the luggage, pram and negotiated my way through the train with 3 very tired small children!!! Thank God I came across a very capable sensible bilingual gentleman who came to my aide and assured me he would sort this out – and he did – and we all proceed to drift off to a deep sleep. :-)

Pisa

This weekend we visited Pisa for the first time, where we visited our dear Aussie/Italian friends G & A. It was a beautiful autumn day, sunny with clear blue skyes. Their home is so welcoming that when spencer arrived to the top level he jubilantly declared “Mum I love our new home!!!” I had to let him down gently…We were also greeted by extra visitors G’s friend from Madrid (who we all felt a bond with immediately as that is where Ceci is now) and A’s parents who spent a day out on our boat last year! While we all got talking the chidren played in the courtyard and in particular the abundance of ripe and very available pomegranate tree. After much deliberation of our options of agenda we decided to head first to a dolce festa just around the corner where we feasted on an intriguing variety of chocolate, gelati, biscotti, spectated in the panforte throwing competition and watched a puppet show ….a true hit with the kids ….how could it be anything else…. After another decision making process we decided to head to the hills where a little villiage  Terricciola, where they were celebrating the Sacra della leper (festival of the hare). This was a really pretty drive through the country side and when we arrived I felt immediately relieved that this was the right decision… it felt like a country fair, a typical town hall with no grand decoration but the passion and essence of the evening was in the preparation of the food.  Everything was based on the preparation of the hare …with pasta..with olives, with beans. Plus some polenta fritta…..not to mention washed down with a good rough red J After eating we naturally adjourned to the dance floor where the kids and I well and truly kicked up our heels. I often think of Nicko when we dance and last night was no exception as my kids like to be the first on the dance floor…just like their Dad. Our dedication to the dance floor was briefly interrupted by the raffle draw….which I won!!! A brand new, very stylish red, green and white vespa styled and vespa branded helmet!!!!! Now all I need is either a vespa or a boyfriend with a vespa ;-)

After a big day of jubilant success we said our goodbyes to G, A, M and our new Spanish friend M and headed home for Lucca, as expected the kids were asleep before we even exited the tiny village and I was in bliss knowing that we had had such a full and happy day.  According to the GPS I was due to arrive to our carpark at 11.55pm but I was happy knowing that we had all had so much fun and that Sunday would truly be a day of rest…. Except about 20min out from home, on the autostrade ….I blew a tyre!!!! This was such an obscure circumstance to be in, my initial reaction was to laugh until I though what to do.. It’s been a very long time since I last changed a tyre and I certainly haven’t changed a 4WD tyre, so I quickly came to the conclusion that in the narrow strip beside the autrostrade in the dark it was best I called for help… So as it was Giovanni’s car I was driving, I called him, fortunately he talked me through the options and I decided to call the 116 number for help. I waited around for an hour or so and eventually a truck arrived …. A big burley Italian man got out ( of course he spoke no English) and with gesture he signaled that I needed to drive the car onto the back of the tow truck where we were to remain while he towed us away to an area with more space…. I just had to have faith that he was a good man and would do the right thing, it was a most obscure feeling being inside the car on the back of a truck, I am not completely sure how safe this is but I was willing to take the chance… Once it was all fixed I discovered that he only takes cash…. Which I did not have enough of so, off on another detour I followed his truck this time to a bancomat in a little village off the autostrade.. All paid up I got back on the autostrade and back to Lucca in a jiff. Surprisingly getting home at 2am I was even more jubilant that the day was FULL of jubilant adventure!

 Giulias pomegranite tree

 Dancing Tuscan country style :-)

 Festival of the Hare...Mum and Dad would be so proud!!

 Magdalena in the winning Helmet!

 Fresh Pomegranite

 Spencer and Andrea

 Malachy at his kindy on San Michelle day where we made wooden swords

 Panforte throwing competition

 stacking the gelati cups after lunch... 

 Entertainment at the markets in Roma

 Just a snippet of the view from our day in the gardens

 Spencer mopping up his abundant adoration

 Malachy and Gabby sleeping through the Panthenon

Spencer and Giovanni walking through the city.

Catching up -as school finally begins!

Well I last left you with my good faith in routine and discipline of the children….. I would love to report glowingly that my children have listen, responded and carried forward as well behaved little creatures…..But, as it happens this parenting business is impossibly difficult. I completely underestimated how challenging these first two months would be, on holidays/no school, with the kids 24/7….. Ouch!!!! It has hurt, overwhelmingly at times! The added pressure of starting a new school, new rules, new culture, new language….it’s BIG!!! But thank God, school has finally commenced, for Gabby and Spencer at least. They started this week at an Italian public school just around the corner from home.  So very different from their school at home, but it’s early days and from the children’s reports they had fun and they were happy to just be in class.

Gabby was a little nervous, complaining of pains in her tummy, which she put down to not knowing the language. Spencie was confident and asked if he could join a pretty little girl colouring in, gave her a cute little smile and said “See ya later Mum!!” Malachy was happy to have his mum to himself for a morning. But from next week he will start Steiner school kindy – interesting and I think it will be just his thing…..they visit the beach every Wednesday and when winter arrives they visit the woods every Wednesday !!!

No major travels to mention, I decided to stay close to home, to get my head around school (nothing is clear – everything is ambiguous – very unsettling),  extracurricular activities, meeting new social networks etc… We have met a very nice multilingual play group that meets twice a week and they have even held an outing at an adventure park (which the children attended with a baby sitter while I had a school meetingL).  These social networks are proving vital as a newly found “detached from workplace” employee.

We have managed a few day trips here and there:

Levanto:

A pretty little beach side village slighty north of the Cinque Terre town Monterosso. This was a great destination as we parked so close to the beach I felt like I was in Australia J But all the bonus’ of a Mediterranean beach! I have to say, I am loving the pebble beach – such clear water!! We arrived  at about  6pm…. home by about 11pm! But the evenings in summer as just so perfect and it makes staying at the beach simply irresistible…..

Visitors:

We have had a steady stream of visitors, which puts us in tour guide position every time – so well infact the kids know the plan down pat! Two tower, bike ride round the walls, concert at san Giovanni in the evening, pizza at Mara Meo (who do a good GF pizza).

I am sure our repertoire will expand, eventually….now I have the hope of some freedom with school I may even get to see some kid un-friendly sights!! Yessss!!!

FIRENZE!!!!!

Once again we have been very warmly welcomed by (as the children have termed “our Italian family”) famiglia Tani.  If you don’t remember from my earlier post in the countryside near Sienna, we spent the day with close family friends of my friends Giulia and Andrea.  We had a great time with them and they kindly invited us to spend the day in Firenze with them, seeing a few sights with them (4 adults and 7 kids).  It was just over 1 hour in the train, which the children were so excited about. And we were welcomed on platform 5 Firenze but the entire family J .  It was so pleasant to be led through this ancient city with locals… not having to look at a map or what was worthy of seeing. I was so happy to be led around, and with such a big helpful family, whom the children are well acquainted with now…. I barely touched a child all day….One exception being when Gabby stood just a tad too close to a stationary horse, taking a well earned break from pulling a carriage load of tourists around and having a bite to eat – when the horse obliviously took a step and shifted his weight onto Gabby’s foot!!! Eventually the owner was able to lift the horses leg and Gabby was set free…Not with out a few dramatic tears and….. as it goes in Italy …. We attracted half the population of Firenze to our side – begging for us to call an ambulance – but after convincing them her foot was indeed not amputated but merely bruised they receded….mildly defeated but felt more confident that we were at least left with an icepack.

Our journey continued and I was pleased that I had chosen to take the pram for the day (which is a rarity for us these days). We managed to visit a number of significant churches during the day, which was made so much easier with the aide of the Tani family. Such amplitudes and abundance of beauty, depth, history, significance and culture is such an indulgent way to spend the day, and I was lucky enough to be guided through it all with such kindness and care. There are some things that money simply cannot buy!

We also managed quite a long visit to the Firenze children’s library, prior to entering we feasted on some freshly purchased formaggi e prosciutto on focaccia – mmmm!!!! The kids had a ball and the parents managed a well earned café and rest!

Eventually we returned back to Nonno e Nonna Tani’s apartment for dinner where, once again, we were entertained and gastronomically delighted.  I have recipe’s this time and will try one tomorrow night!!! Gabby said “mum best entire dinner I have ever had” and I tend to agree! One of the touching things for me in regards to the meal was that everything was entirely gluten free.  So considerate and perhaps Gabby enjoyed it even more because she was able to share the entire meal with everyone.  I think sharing food can be such an intimately emotional experience but probably 99% of the time we are unconscious of  the importance or the treasure of its existence in our lives.  It  was a truly memorable experience once again. It is so touching when new friends come into your lives and truly touch your heart! 

 moments of brotherly love...

 Matteo - captain of the pram for the day :-)

 Spencer going from shoulder to shouler

 moments before the horse v's foot incident...

 Spencer enjoying the meaning of his favourite outfit :-)

 The entire family (bar nonni)

 a fun way to get around for the boys !

 Spencer climbing all over the sculpture outside Palazzo Pitti

 The best family shot we could do... not a bad view though!

 This is exactly why I was grateful for the pram!!!

......You couldn't ask for a nicer picture!

Contradiction’s and comparison’s…and gabbys first taste of italian gluten :-(

Ok, I lied, I said I would not compare…..in an ideal world that would be the case …. But alas, I am imperfect and I have sucombe to the temptation of comparing cross culturally!!!! Eeeek!!! I know not glamorous, but unavoidable sorry…..

I am not completely to blame though…. I like to think I have been culturally pressured into contemplating the differences…. Especially when it comes to the children’s local park….

Yes… the park … of all places… this is where I am having to dig deep for blending in purposes….by profession I research in childhood injury prevention and am well aware of the many dangers that threaten our youngsters…. BUT I have always let my children run free in the park – unless they are strangling each other – it is a chance for them to explore and mingle without there mother looming over there shoulder, and in my opinion of my children, they are more than physically capable….The benefits of growth this has on the children are fantastic: there confidence to do things independently both physically and socially (they socialize much better without me around) is far too great to be wasted on being “precious in the park”…. So as you may have guessed, my three rambunctious little aussies are causing a bit of a stir at the park, as I take a blissful opportunity to relax on a park bench and watch my children play.  Here at least the local Italian mamma’s and nonna’s are close beside there children (as old as Gabby) for there duration at the park….. and if the inevitable spill occurs, it is such a drama!!! Here comes the comparison….eek… “with my children…” a simple spill does get acknowledgement, I just say “dust it off – you’ll be right!” and they generally carry on… In Australia this form of acknowledgement is acceptable – but not on your nelly, here in the lucca parks,  a simple spill gets almost park shut down…..

The contradiction:

This may sit more comfortably with me if for instance, these families attending the park rode off wearing helmets. It is a rare sight to spot a bicycle helmet in this town and formal bike restaints even less.

If we take it futher afield… a complete ignorance to safety of the road and with driving…. Children are seemingly treated like precious crystals at the park but everybody drives like lunatics on the road – again often improperly restraining children….I know this is just a small sample size but I am getting over the evil eyes and gasps of exasperation at the park…. Next Tuesday I am meeting up with a new crowd at a new park and hopefully we fit in better….

New friends…

On a brighter note we met up with a family from Gabby’s school whom we did not know previously until we decided to come to Lucca.  Jane and Laurie had 3 kids in Gabby’s school and have been here in Lucca for 12 months… all three of there children are now fluently speaking in Italian. We spent a lovely afternoon and evening with our new friends and with twin 9 year old boys Jane didn’t blink twice at the style of my children playing…. Jane had an abundance of local tips and tricks, and Laurie had some great bargain tips….. We ended up staying for dinner the took a stroll with gelati, we inherited a few old hand-me-down bikes and we finally arrived home at 11.30 pm for bedtime….

Gabby’s first Gluten run-in

Yesterday Gabby accidentally consumed one of the boys slices of pizza at lunch time and as per usual she started throwing up. I mentioned this to my landlady and she insisted to take us to their third generation pediatric homeopathic dr. Only catch was she could only meet us outside the city walls…Gabby was still throwing up ferociously…and the boys were in the middle of their afternoon nap!! So against the grain again, I shook the boys up told them it was an emergency, and carried a vomiting Gabby downstairs… The boys lept to attention and were on a mission, with scooters under foot they were off… With Gabby flopping around on the back of my bike …. Vomiting all the way…. You can imagine the spectacle we caused on our way out of town….

In the end we saw the lovely Dr and he prescribed a plethora of homeopathic remedies…. We usually can do nothing in these gluten-crises moments so it felt good to think we were doing something…. But I have to say, Gabby has recovered very quickly today much faster than usual! So we will keep this remedy close to us at all times…

In fact she has recovered so well that this afternoon we are off to see our friend Flavio at the horse riding school for lessons right now!!!

Ciao amici!! 

                      

a late night stroll and gelati with new amici :-)

.... and speaking of comparisons... park attire.... my birkenstocks are a world away from platform wedges an a mini ruffle skirt :-)

Family politics.....

Well we survived the return journey home from Lampedusa, but to say the least I was exhausted!! Happy, so happy to have had the experience but the constant child wrangling took it’s toll on my psychologically…L

Luckily for me when I returned to Lucca, I was met at the train station by a very dear Aussie friend, Emma.  Emma and I became close friends about 3 years ago after discovering that we had both suffered the tragic and untimely/unfair loss of our husbands….It is not common to find such young widows and even less likely to have so much in common….or more specifically mutual understanding of some ridiculously outrageous / irrational thoughts!! Enough said…she is a fantastic friend who turned up at the perfect time, as she has done before!

After a month of moving around and discovering new things, I realized that I was leaning to heavily on bribery to coerce the children, rather than getting them to do things “because I said so”.  The first few days after our return from Lampedusa I was swamped with “mum if I tidy these toys can I have a euro”, “when is pay day mum?”, “can we have a gelato mum”, “I want, I want , I want!!!!!”…….ENOUGH!!!!! It was literally driving me crazy … The negotiation is over!!! I will say what goes – end of story!!! Money is not only confiscated – it is banned from conversation!! After some lengthy conversations with Emma and my Italian friend Giovanni, I felt that something had to change ….drastically….. One of these being that I need to feel more free to raise my voice at the children…..  For so long I have tried to compose myself with poise and dignity, in a sense to prove to “whoever” that I am ok….we are ok….we are coping……well as it turns out, pretending I am ok doesn’t mean that I am “ok”.  So, over the last few days I have been putting my lungs into practice at yelling at the children…..and enforcing my newly found “authority”…. It’s early day’s, too early for judgment…but the lines that have been drawn, have been drawn clearly, loudly, boldly with no room for misinterpretation… Without doubt the battles will continue but I see clearly now that what these children need more than anything is a mother that can provide limitation’s and boundaries. A mother who can offer them strength by simply saying “no” or “no more”! Lord knows I have given them strength in love, patience and kindness, and this will continue… but I see now that this is alone is exhaustive, boundaries are required and the time is now for this family to find them….draw them….and build on these….

Ok, I need to leave you on a positive note…..the week has not been completely terrible – don’t let your hearts bleed for me – I am in Italy after all J

Some of you may remember that it was this time last year that I was in Positano with my friend Emma….it was then that I was thinking, geez it would be great to bring the kids to Italy for a holiday….. and so here we are again…. 12 months on, in Italy again with Emma….with the kids!!!

So I wanted to show Emma some local attractions and surrounds… We have cycled around the walls, climbed the two main towers, eaten and drunk bucket loads of good food and grog, visited the villa for a swim….but two highlights (for me at least) were:

1)   Visiting the “Grotta del Vento” in the Garfagnana region, unfortunately we were unable to take our cameras inside the grotto to capture the crystal-like formations on the inside of these mystical caves that offered me a plethora of inspiration for my newly found “storytelling/bullshit spinning” with the children. After our cave exploring came the highlight for me when opened up my packed picnic (which is consistently packed full of local delights of olives, salame, artichokes, and various chopped veggies).  After polishing off the picnic the children roamed free in the surrounding mountainous bush ranges and rocks… they love the feeling of freedom to explore and after carrying a scared Malachy through the caves for 1 hour,  I was happy to have the space…. Rest assured, there was JUST enough space, I could still hear and occaisionally see the children to know they were ok. They were happy as pigs in mud!!

2)   Cinque Terra: I first visited le cinque terra in 2003 with Nicko, after a tip off from my big sister as a must do in Italia.  When Nick and I visited we loved it, even though it was winter and swimming just was not a possibility.  We did the walk with relative ease and absolute delight.  We both mentioned that it would be a great place to visit in summer (not really thinking the possibility would ever eventuate) ….. Well, this time around the opposite occurred, in the height of summer, any temptation to walk was immediately quashed on our arrival and the intense desire to get into that ocean was impossible to ignore….As soon as our train pulled into Monterosso we headed straight to the beach – paid the ridiculous 30 euro for an umbrella – ripped off our clothes (into undies for the kids – travelling lightly is my priority at the moment) ….an ahhhhhhhhh submerged into the Ligurian ocean!!!!!!  I felt jubilant once again – after our drive to LaSpezia – finding a car park – literally running across train tracks – sweltering on the unairconditioned train – we were in Italian heaven once again.  The extremes are so broad, the efforts seem greater – but the rewards so much sweeter – which is something Nicko used to say regularly, it’s so true. It was a beautiful time in Monterosso, the kids collected rocks for about 2 hours and I was chief rock classifaction….. the kids found “rock eggs from dinosaurs to snuffleuffigus’ to gruffallo to platapus’”….. this was topped off with a granite di fragola for the kids and a lemon daiquiri for the adulti!!! The happy travellers felt confident to try out the next town along and caught the train one stop back to Vernazza… it was about 2pm by this stage, the day was sweltering, and the village was packed full….. within 5 mins of our arrival, I lost Malachy completely!!!! F#@K!!!!! How could this happen?!?! I walked up and down the hill yelling out his name ----NOWHERE!!! People around me could feel the intensity of my desperation and helpers quickly came to my aide…. Only a total of 5 mins had past and finally I saw my white haired baby walked back up the hill …..sad faced…saying “why did you lose me mum?”!!!! I immediately broke down in tears, telling him to never do this to me again…. Once we regained strength after our scare we decided it was time to make tracks home again…..

We have decided to stick to Lucca in the recent days and with my newly found disciplining structure/dictatorship; I think this has been a good decision…  One evening we spent a pleasant time at one of the bar’s on the city walls.  I managed to captivate the children with a story about trolls and fairy’s in one of the local duomo’s whilst I delighted in yet another daiquiri in the perfect Italian dusk…. I guess on of the recipes to our ongoing success of being here is the compromises… there is no way the kids are going to tolerate traditional tours (that I would love to indulge in)  but the structures and architecture are inspiring regardless of your age – and evoking my inner storyteller……. Sure they are full of fiction but… the best stories always are!!!

Again much love to all and don’t be concerned… I will continue to give the children lots of cuddles and love regardless of my newly found autocracy!!

Extra pictures from Lampedusa..